I unlock the door to the suburban tri-level home for a showing with my buyers J.D. and Diane. The first thing that hits us is the strong smell of animals and filth. We peak inside the door and Diane says “let’s don’t go in”. I say “we have to, it’ll be like watching an episode of the television show Hoarders.” Today, I’m going to present some of the adventures in Denver real estate that I’ve had while showing homes. I hope that you’ll remember these stories the next time you need to sell a home. These are good examples of how to sell and how not to sell a home. I’ve had many interesting showing experiences since I became a Realtor. Today I will share three experiences with you. First, don’t be a hoarder, second, it may be legal but…, third, mmmm, pie!
Let me go back to the story I opened with. My buyers, J.D. and Diane, decide to go ahead with the showing. We walk through the front door and the only way to go is through the narrow path into the living room. The house is completely filled with stuff. In some parts of the room, the stuff is stacked to the ceiling. Next to the path, it’s only stacked four feet high or so. We continue on our journey completely overwhelmed by all the stuff. Every room we venture into is filled with stuff just like the living room. We bravely decide to go down the stairs into the basement. This is when I realize that some of the stuff is worth lots of money. The family room has a pool table and stuff is stacked on it to the ceiling. There are also stacks under it and all around it. All of the stuff in this room is Star Wars collectibles. From action figures of Darth Vader to models of the Death Star, they had every collectible imaginable. I’ve never seen such a huge or disorganized Star Wars collection. Our tour of the hoarder home is an experience that J.D., Diane and I will never forget. Needless to say, they didn’t end up buying the hoarder house.
Since voters in Colorado legalized marijuana, I’ve had many interesting showing experiences. On a recent showing with my buyer Alan, I unlocked the door to a ranch home in Denver and the smell of marijuana hit us like a ton of bricks. The home was in good condition and showed well except for the large closet with grow lights and a few pot plants growing. The smell of fresh growing pot was overwhelming. On another recent showing with my buyer Renee, we found a much larger growing operation. We were looking at a newer suburban foreclosed home in Thornton when we found a huge grow room. This room was hidden and could only be accessed via a small hidden door in the utility room. The walls and ceiling were completely covered in a reflective material. The owners had obviously been growing pot on an industrial scale. Industrial sized grow operations in homes are still not legal in Colorado even after we legalized marijuana. From the outside of this home and from the neighborhood, you would never guess there was an industrial pot growing operation inside. Neither Alan nor Renee bought the pot houses. I think houses like these require the right stoner buyer.
I also have a great example of how to creatively sell your home. I recently had a showing experience with my buyer Alex that I’ve never had before. I open the door to the beautiful mountain home on 40 acres in the foothills of Golden. The smell of fresh baked apple pie lures us in. On the kitchen island, there is a fresh baked apple pie. Two slices have been put on plates and there’s a note inviting us to have a piece. Alex and I look at each other with a surprised look. Alex says “I just ate a big lunch”. I say “I’ve just eaten too”. Alex says “but it would be rude not to eat it”. I say “I agree”. We each eat a large piece of the fresh baked pie and it is delicious. The sellers also left us a pitcher of ice water and glasses to wash the pie down. This was by far the best food offering I’ve ever had at a showing. We proceeded to look at the home and its million dollar view. Alex even brought her Mom back to see the home at a second showing but there wasn’t pie the second time. In the end, Alex decided against this home because it had a half mile long driveway but the pie almost sealed the deal. Perhaps if the seller had left pie for the second showing, Alex may have bought the home, we’ll never know.
I wish I had more time today to tell you more stories of adventures in Denver real estate. I could go on all night. Please remember these stories the next time you need to sell a home. Don’t be a hoarder, it may be legal but….., and mmmm, pie!